CaribbeanChoice.com
   HOME |  Carnival |  Recipes |  Gourmet Shop |  Islands |  Games |  Market |  News |  Links |  Events |  Articles |  Forums  |  Search 

 Forum Categories
 Main Menu
 

 Popular Forums 

 Newsletters 


 Food 


 Caribbean Corner 

Feedback   
Tell us what you think!
Tell us what you want!



 
   Tuesday, December 10, 2019 

  Active TopicsActive Topics  Display List of Forum MembersMemberlist  CalendarCalendar  Search The ForumSearch  HelpHelp
  RegisterRegister  LoginLogin
Relationships & Family
 CaribbeanChoice : General Discussion : Relationships & Family
Message Icon Topic: Can men who cheat before stay faithful? Post Reply Post New Topic
Page  of 14 Next >>
Author Message
disguised
Landlubber
Landlubber
Avatar

Joined: 05†Mar†2007
Location: Singapore
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5

Singapore.gif, 0 kB

Quote disguised Replybullet Topic: Can men who cheat before stay faithful?
    Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 7:39am

I have been with a man who is 20 years my senior for 2 years. His first wife cheated on him. He divorced her and remarried a few years later. He has been with this current wife for more than 10 years now but their relationship had soured greatly over the years and especially over the last few years and now he is staying with her for the children. I told him recently that I want to end the relationship if our relationship is headed nowhere and I gave him some time to think about it.

I have been very troubled over several issues. I know that he loves me deeply but im very insecure. He cheated on this wife many times with many young and pretty flings before and I really don't know if he can stay faithful to me if we really are together in the end. I get jealous easily too because he tends to have the 'wandering eye' which makes me as though im not pretty enough.
 
Can men who cheat before not cheat again? Is it possible?
 
 I will be going overseas for about one year too. Im afraid that he would cheat on me. How can i ever know?


Edited by disguised - 05†Mar†2007 at 7:43am
There you go again..
IP IP Logged
vutjebal
Vice Admiral
Vice Admiral
Avatar
Welcome Committee

Joined: 23†Feb†2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 34607

Aruba.GIF, 0 kB

Quote vutjebal Replybullet Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 8:24am

Welkom and Bonbini...disguised....Hug

I only have  an answer .......I am talking for myself....but.....Console
 
He can only try to cheat on me.....Just one time...there will be no second time..Head%20Smack..
 

It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.
IP IP Logged
Scott
Administrator
Administrator
Avatar
CaribbeanChoice Staff

Joined: 01†Sept†2003
Location: Texas
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 9744

Conch Republic Texas.gif, 0 kB

Quote Scott Replybullet Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 9:25am
Well, it is certainly possible he won't cheat.  But then again, if he has a history of it, and he isn't ashamed of it, then it probably will happen again.  If he is truly ashamed with it, then it may not happen again.

Also, the straight truth is, if someone isn't getting what they need at home (male or female), they typically will at least think of going elsewhere... and some will be strong enough to resist and some won't.

If I am understanding you correctly, you are with him and he still is married... in a failing/failed marriage?

While there are cases where the man leaves his wife, and two lovebirds live happily ever after, but I would say 80% to 90% of the time, someone is playing someone.  Unless you are a good match for each other, and he has learned a few things about having a good marriage, the probability is that he will repeat what has happened in the past.  Of course, he may have learned something this time around.

If they are truly just staying together for the kids, and the current wife has no interest in him, then the current wife wouldn't have a problem with him sleeping with you, right?  After all, they are just together for the kids, and she can go sleep with whomever she wants to also, right?

But I doubt that is the case.

If you have to sneak around her back, then I suspect that he is playing her, which means that he is, or will play you... most likely.

Of course, its always hard to make a character determination on such little information.  You may have left out vital information in his favor or that goes against him.

I would be careful either way.
Scott M. Stolz
CaribbeanChoice.com. Inc. Staff
WisTex | Complete Hosting Guide
IP IP Logged
disguised
Landlubber
Landlubber
Avatar

Joined: 05†Mar†2007
Location: Singapore
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5

Singapore.gif, 0 kB

Quote disguised Replybullet Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 9:53am

thanks for your replySmile 

Well, apparently, the situation is rather complicated. His wife wouldn't want to stay in the marriage simply for the kids. In a way, only he is. He tries to be nice to her and do whatever she wants him to do so the family remains intact. So, he is trying to be a husband(and according to him, without intimacy) for the sake of being a good father to the kids, especially his youngest son whom he loves more than anything else including himself.

There is too, much complications about the marriage. But my greatest concern is actually his conscience. Will he ever cheat on me ? Guess vutjebal is right, if he does, and i do find out(which is hard because he is extremely careful and streetsmart), it'll only be once.

There you go again..
IP IP Logged
Scott
Administrator
Administrator
Avatar
CaribbeanChoice Staff

Joined: 01†Sept†2003
Location: Texas
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 9744

Conch Republic Texas.gif, 0 kB

Quote Scott Replybullet Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 9:56am
Well, typically, if a man will cheat on his wife to be with you, he is also capable of cheating on you too.
Scott M. Stolz
CaribbeanChoice.com. Inc. Staff
WisTex | Complete Hosting Guide
IP IP Logged
vutjebal
Vice Admiral
Vice Admiral
Avatar
Welcome Committee

Joined: 23†Feb†2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 34607

Aruba.GIF, 0 kB

Quote vutjebal Replybullet Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 9:57am
Vietnamese...disguised..Wink
It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.
IP IP Logged
Snowflake
Captain
Captain
Avatar

Joined: 27†Aug†2005
Location: European Union
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5066

pirate-flag-small.gif, 0 kB European-Union.gif, 0 kB

Quote Snowflake Replybullet Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 10:00am
Originally posted by vutjebal

Welkom and Bonbini...disguised....Hug

I only have  an answer .......I am talking for myself....but.....Console
 
He can only try to cheat on me.....Just one time...there will be no second time..Head%20Smack..
 

 
 
Same here!
IP IP Logged
vutjebal
Vice Admiral
Vice Admiral
Avatar
Welcome Committee

Joined: 23†Feb†2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 34607

Aruba.GIF, 0 kB

Quote vutjebal Replybullet Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 10:30am
Originally posted by Snowflake

Originally posted by vutjebal

Welkom and Bonbini...disguised....Hug

I only have  an answer .......I am talking for myself....but.....Console
 
He can only try to cheat on me.....Just one time...there will be no second time..Head%20Smack..
 

 
 
Same here!
EmbarrassedSmile
It is better to take refuge in the LORD than to trust in man.
IP IP Logged
sandra
Privateer
Privateer
Avatar

Joined: 22†Aug†2005
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 8555

Dominica.gif, 0 kB

Quote sandra Replybullet Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 1:06pm
They'll cheat again and again untill there's no more juice left in them, when they're washed out, sick or terminally ill.   Then and only then they'll stay faithful to you.

Welcome, disguised.
I asked for all things so that I might enjoy life; I was given life so that I might enjoy all things
IP IP Logged
msjoy
Quartermaster
Quartermaster
Avatar

Joined: 01†Dec†2005
Location: United States
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1740

Conch Republic United-States.gif, 0 kB

Quote msjoy Replybullet Posted: 05†Mar†2007 at 2:13pm
Welcome to the CC Family.

Iím a firm believer that everyone deserves a second chance. But it appears that your partner has gotten several chances and the behavior has not changed. He has to have the desire to make the change and to be satisfied with the person that is in his life. Apparently he has not grown up. You may be better off leaving him alone. Its reminds me of when dog eat eggs they donít stop.

(Iím not calling men dogs) PLEASE

IP IP Logged
Page  of 14 Next >>
Post Reply Post New Topic
Printable version Printable version

Forum Jump
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot create polls in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum



This page was generated in 0.063 seconds.

 More Destinations     

New Articles | New Recipes | Active Topics | New Links | Announcements & What's New

Google
 

CaribbeanChoice.com - Your Gateway to the Caribbean
One Love. One People. All Caribbean!™

Proverb: There is more in de motar dan de pestle.
Meaning: There is more to the issue than appears on the surface.

del.icio.us digg technorati YahooMyWeb Reddit FURL BlinkList

Member Center

Welcome Guest

Register
Login

Search  
E-mail & IM 
New & Updated Articles


 
Sponsored Links
Battle of the Islands


Venezuela
Current Leader

Jamaica
2nd Most Active

vutjebal
Most Active User



Complete Hosting Guide

Life is Transformational

Visionary Learning Studios


HOME | Culture | E-mail | Community | Resources | Disclaimer | CaribProud.com | Advertising | About Us
 Copyright © 1998-2010 CaribbeanChoice.com. Inc.  All rights reserved.